This week has really gotten away from me! This working for a living business is interfering with my life!
I did pretty good with the first part of the 2WW… probably because there is nothing to know… logically there is no symptoms. Oh how I wish my uterus was equipped with a window!! Probably about Friday, I started to count the #dp3dt and thusly started googling stupid symptoms. Symptoms I know are not logical or are perfectly attributed to the lovely progesterone I put into my lady bits twice per day. I had no symptoms with Abby until probably 5-6 weeks in. I KNOW THIS! An example of the crazy: I had exceptionally greasy hair on Friday (I wash my hair every other day and Friday was a no wash day. Usually by bedtime, my hair is looking kinda gross… but on Friday morning as I got ready for work, my hair was disgusting!), so of course, I googled “greasy hair and very early pregnancy symptoms”. Oye. Just oye. Why oh why, does progesterone have to have the same symptoms as pregnancy?! Sigh.
I’m also trying to decide when to pee… on a stick, that is. With Abby, I held out until Tuesday (9dp3dt) and it was negative. And then I tested again the morning of our beta. I have to pre-know. It’s a control thing… and complete and utter impatience. But mostly control. Stay tuned…
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again… what would I do without my girlfriends? I have the most amazing friends anyone could ever ask for. They are all so different and they have all been there for me in different but exactly perfect ways. You can’t pick your family, but you can pick your friends. And I think when you have a shitty family (not everyone obviously, but the support from most of our family has been non-existent. And for me especially, I have members of my family who haven’t been apart of my life for many, many years), there is a drive to create a pseudo-family. My babies may not have any biological aunties or uncles in their lives, but they will have lots of aunties and uncles looking out for them!
I spent a really fun night scrapping with my scrappy friends last night and it was just what I needed. They are crazy girls and I love them all. I asked them if we could get together to break up my 2WW and they jumped right on it. Laughs, chocolate, lattes and pizza… and a little scrapping… perfect.
Frosties. We have some!!! We had 6 remaining embryos that they cultured to day 5 and 2 made it. Obviously, I’m thrilled that we had something to freeze this time, but there’s the insecure, doomed-to-fail part of me that panicked… “only 2?!”. That’s 1/3. That means 2/3s bit the dust. What does that say about the little embabies that are in the ute? And I, of course, asked the embryologist this, and she, of course, said that it doesn’t mean anything because, of course, what else is she going to say?! I resisted the urge to call my clinic and get
talked off the ledge validated by the nurses there. I put on my big girl pants and told myself that the ute is the best incubator and these little ones are just fine. This ute grew out my little 5 or 6 cell Abby, so it has just as good of a chance in growing out my little 8 cell M &/or E. Yes, they have names, of course.