I’m officially more pregnant than I’ve ever been. Doesn’t make me feel any less terrified, but I’m happy to have made it through my scary window. In fact, I’m a little more terrified than ever. Because I’m starting to adore this little guy.
Oh yeah, we’re having a boy. I had an ultrasound at 16 weeks, and our little boy gave in to his momma’s bribe to buy him something blue/pink if he gave up the goods. He proudly displayed his penis… legs splayed wide open. Not a gentleman, for sure.
Universe help me, knowing that he’s a boy has made me even more attached. (To be clear, it didn’t matter whether he was a boy or a girl, I mean knowing one way or the other has helped). It makes him more concrete, instead of this abstract concept of “baby”. Does that make sense? And we’ve been calling him by his name. He’s more real now. Which, I suppose, is why my love for him is getting even stronger.
And in other news, we pulled off the band-aid and went Face.book official. We never got to do that with Abby until after she was gone. We told the FB world about her on Bereaved Mother’s Day. It was scary to share on FB, but it needed to be done. We needed to share our son with the world.
Absolutely amazing. It’s still sinking in. I’ve told him he has to stay cooking for at least another 20 weeks. I want nothing more in the world than for him to be our take home rainbow baby.